The story of some painting

I had dimensions and the motive. 

I started to research the motive, the symbolic. Within that I started to search for pictures on net – Saint Florian + painted glass. When I have found the one I was satisfied with, I saw that it has very different dimensions than the glass I was supposed to paint on. Thus, I’ve put chosen picture in the middle and started thinking about side design. Father suggested just flames, but St. Florian is flame – fighter and I wanted to portray the essence of main motive in alternative, yet harmonious way. I’ve decided that I will focus on extinguishing as a deed and have zoomed in & reshaped detail of the main motive. I’ve mirrored it on the both sides. Then I’ve decided that I will connect all three parts with sky lines & colours.

I’ve put the drawing under the glass and copied it with black contour. Then I started to paint the main figure, because I was choosing colours on the spot and I wanted to see how will they interact. I have also coloured 2 vertical grey lines which are separating motive on 3 parts (I have played with warm and cold grey shades).  Then I have continued with water, flames and a pitcher – again to see how colours will look together. So far, I was very satisfied with the result, but then - ‘catastrophe’.

I’ve just started to colour the sky when I’ve awkwardly put down the white paint at the side of the glass – partly on my phone - while concentrating that drop would not fall down from brush on what was already painted… so white paint has poured over already coloured flames and water… The problem was, that I have used all the colours for flames & water and that colours were given to me in glass bottles of tablets – thus I had no idea which brand and colours were in there before…  I was so shocked that I picked up the paint and have put it in the same spot, because I couldn’t believe what has just happened. And paint has fallen again…

I’ve tried to wipe the paint down gently, but I couldn’t remove it totally without destroying the flames… thus I have leave it half wiped and just started to cry… I have called my mother, who has ordered that piece, and told her that I have f****d up.
I have leave it for few days and then I have taken it with me when I have visited my parents. We were looking at it. I’ve remembered that I could remove colour with acetone and my boyfriend suddenly came to idea – why don’t you just turn it around – on the other side mistake is barely visible. And so, the new hope for painting has started.
I have leaved flames as they were – with little white over them, I have used acetone and many many ear sticks to remove white colour + some water fields. And then I started to paint the sky from the beginning. Very carefully and with lots of patience… Then I saw that paintings actually looks better on the other side as white colour was covering black contour on the original side too much.

Final creation wasn’t exactly what I was planning / hoping for, but the process was very precious experience to me. I have learned that I need to listen myself; in the beginning there was the thought ‘you better make more clean space on the table before you start creating – you know you have to act quickly if something goes wrong and searching for place on which you will put material with sticky colour will slow you down’. The lesson about slowing down & precision & patience lol… While painting on glass, one needs all of those. If one does not take them into account soon enough – the lesson will just be prolonged / it will become next level problem. Another lesson was in relation to drama of quitting. Right after the ‘accident’ has happened I was really thinking about throwing the whole thing away within disappointment… However, my father has bought the glass, therefore I have decided to keep it, clean all colours down and reuse it for something else (as I have believed that I have crossed the deadline for this specific order). I have given myself some time & I’ve consulted with others and the consequence was to not keep just the glass plate, but to keep the painting and to reshape / reorganise it. So I have managed to shift from problem oriented mind to solution orientation – with help of others – and instead of quitting and bitter experience we have finished painted glass and satisfaction. How cool is that!? 😊

This is actually not just the story of some painting...
it is story about my relationship, about process of changing my relationship...